Wednesday, March 26, 2008

66 Tips For Better Networking - #65 - Don't Be Full Of Yourself

Route 66 - The Journey Toward Success

Don't Be Full Of Yourself

Part of being a human being is that we often get wrapped up in our own view of the world. I do it, and so do you. When our first reaction is to see ourselves as always right, then we are quick to be disappointed with those around us.

Looking at any controversial issue... be it political, religious, social or otherwise, we bring to the table our own experiences and points of view that cause our personal emotions and prejudices to rise to the top. We cannot avoid this, as it is human nature. Yet this often leaves us bitter and angry at others.

We see this play out heavily in presidential (and other political) campaigns. Just watch the high level of emotions and mud-slinging you see on TV in regards to Hillary Clinton, Barak Obama and John McCain. The hate and disgust that many have toward the ones they oppose is a great example. Most of us do not know these candidates personally nor do we understand their whole life story, so to "hate" them is not right. Sure, we can disagree with their positions on issues, but I reserve "hate" for the really bad guys.

I want to be right in all circumstances, but have discovered that there are usually multiple sides to every situation (not just two sides), and I can only see one at a time. Complicated issues are not just black and white. The gray areas between black and white have unlimited shades. When so sure of their own position, people often jump to conclusions without knowing all the details. Swimming in the gray area before fighting the fight always brings perspective.

When I forget to be respectful of others and choose to see them as instantly wrong during a disagreement, then I am being short-sighted and small-minded. God, I hate it when I do that! And when I see others do this it makes me sad for them as well.

The good news is that I try to learn from every situation I encounter, right or wrong. I know that if I learn, then I am doing something right….even if I stub my toe along the way.

My dad taught me not to be "full of myself" and to respect others who have differing opinions. These differences are what make us powerful. When we can work together to find similarities and can work in tandem to create win-win solutions, everyone prospers. When we seek to divide and demonize other people, we all fail.

Have A Great Day.

thom
www.thomsinger.com




3 comments:

Mary Pat said...

This is one of the best posts in the "66" series. Good insight into how people react to stuff, but hard to change people because they wont see themselves in what you write. Yes, they will see these self-centered traits in others, but not look in the mirror.

MP

Anonymous said...

Your post touches on an important issue, but you do not go all the way.

Many people are taught to win at all cost that they have no problem hurting others to reach victory.

It is not just about being right or "not being full of yourself". It is about manipulation of a situation for personal gain. They lose all sight of reality.

Not many people like shades of gray, as it hurts their cause. We do not live in a respectful society.

Name held back. you know who I am.

Anuj said...

You are absolutely correct in saying that as human we have natural tendency to get bogged down in our world and refuse to see any other vista.

We need to break the "I" world to emancipate ourself. This becomes very vital when it comes to business networking.

Anuj Pathania
Business India